Other possible titles:
- Yo Mama Is A Geek When….
- Disillusioning 7 Year Olds for Fun and Profit
- Submarines: They’ll Kill You
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8:00PM
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{Tia is tucking The Goose into bed. Gives The Goose a kiss. Says goodnight. Flicks off the lights and starts escaping to sit on Facebook for hours}
Goose: Mom?
Tia: Yes, Goosepotato?
Goose: Is Opa from Kitimat?
Tia: No. Opa is from POWELL RIVER. He moved to Kitimat to work when he was a young man.
Goose: Powell River?
Tia: Yes. My second favorite place in the world. The beaches are so beautiful. I spent my summers there as a kid. *Sigh*
Goose: I wish I could go there.
Tia: You were there for my cousin’s wedding when you were little.
Goose: I don’t remember.
Tia: You were a toddler. It was before BabyDuck was born.
Goose: I wish I could remember.
Tia: Maybe there are videos on YouTube!
Goose: Yes! We can watch videos!
Tia: I will get the computer!
{Tia and The Goose sit in bed and start watching tourism videos about Powell River.}
Topic transitions from Powell River to Texada Island quarries.
From the quarries to the Sooke Potholes.
The Potholes to the Hirsch Creek Jumping bridge in Kitimat.
To watching footage of snow clearance in Kitimat last year.
Tia: THOSE WINNIPEG PEOPLE THINK THEY KNOW WHAT SNOW IS? THEY DON’T KNOW WHAT SNOW IS. LOOK AT THAT SNOW.
Goose: I know! Stupid Winnipeg people. This isn’t snow!
Somehow this becomes a transition point to discussing the following:
– Kemano
– Cassiar
– Amchitka bombing
– Aleutian Islands
– Bering Straight
– The migration of early first nations people from Asia
– Watching Warren Miller ski videos in Alaska
– Looking at maps of Alaska’s proximity to Russia
– Watching ice breakers near Nome
– And a 45 minute National Geographic documentary on nuclear powered submarines and the US Navy.
{Battery dies}
The Goose: That is so cool! I’m going to design a submarine for those Americans tomorrow when I wake up. It will be better than that stupid thing. It will be powered by AIR!
Tia: Good night Goose.
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Time: 10:00 PM
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Citizen Sourpuss 