Nothing Says “Heritage House” Like a Fire/Stripper Pole in the Living Room

Great news, people! If you’ve been looking for a fantastic little heritage home in the heart of old Chilliwack, look no further.

In a noble effort to keep it real, the present owners have installed a fire pole/stripper pole from the top floor to the main floor via the living room. Now, how can you say no to that?

In their words:

“This is a 1932 character home fully renovated to incorporate new style into a classic home.  The renovations completed include, Original wood floors throughout the house, fresh paint in every room, eight inch baseboards, crown moulding, and updated electrical and lighting. A fireman’s pole has been added for convenient access to the first floor from the second. The house Includes four newer appliances and a two year old gas hot water tank.”

I can see why they thought this was a good idea. Why run down pesky stairs to answer the door? Slide down! When you need that glass of water at 2 am? Slide down! When you want to punish Grandma for peeing the bed again? Make her climb UP. Alternatively, it had potential as a stripper pole, but the placement close to the wall makes it difficult to run at it, spin upside down, or hook your leg around it and twirl without bashing into the wall repeatedly. This is a shame, because my accountant would probably be able to set you up with some bangin’ tax deductions for having a strip joint as a home based business. (The City of Chilliwack may have issues with the zoning though.)

It saddens me that this winner was not on the market when we were looking last year, because the whole pole/living room/hole in upstairs floor/childproofing FAIL is something that I’ve had on my wish list, right after his and hers side x side toilets.

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